Posted by Rich in Relationships | 0 comments
Rules For Bringing Home A Man
To avoid any unexpected one-night-disasters I’ve put together a list of 10 cardinal rules for bringing home a man and making it a success (or at least not an embarrassment!)
1.If you live with anyone warn them, and him. You don’t want any disastrous crossings in the corridor.
2. Men are so unreliable, make sure you have a stash of condoms yourself because they just can’t be trusted.
3. Don’t bother offering him coffee, you and I both know he’s there for one thing and it certainly ain’t coffee!
4. If you’ve got any embarrassing items in your room like mouldy stuffed toys from your infant years or photos of your ex – excuse yourself for a moment and hide them!
5. Don’t bother rushing to the bathroom to reapply your make-up – he’s come home with you, he already thinks you’re good-looking.
6.Save any outlandish sex acts for another time (if you actually ever see him again). Men can become intimidated by forward women they hardly know.
7. Keep a spare toothbrush for ‘guests’ - he doesn’t need to know how many mouths its been in.
8. Don’t wear pyjamas…it’s not right. Either wear his shirt or nothing – simple.
9.Do not kiss him in the morning until you’ve cleaned your teeth. It’s OK for men to smell because, well, they’re men – you don’t want to be the one-night-stand with bad breath.
10. If you actually like him after all this, cooking him breakfast in the morning will earn you extra points and should also give you enough time to decide if you want to see him again!
