I Slept With My Best Friend

Dear Mike,

Help Help Help! I’ve done something unbelievably stupid. I went out on a night out with my Best Friend and ended up sleeping with him by accident! This is completely out of character for me as I’ve only slept with one other person and that was in a long term relationship. He’s my best mate and I feel like we’ve ruined our friendship. Why did this happen? Things are pretty awkward between us and I don’t know how he feels. What do I do?

Thanks,

Kathy, 24. Edinburgh, UK

Hi Kathy,

First of all – don’t panic… this can be fixed.

It’s so easy to play it back over and over in your mind wishing things had been different.  What’s happened has happened. There’s no going back and what’s important now is how you get your friendship back on track.

Be sure to take some time out by yourself and establish how you truly feel about what happened. Was it really an accident? Did you actually enjoy it? How do you think he feels? When you answer these difficult questions you’ll find out how you can move forward.

Awkward as it may seem, the next step is meeting up and chatting things through - but make sure you’re sober as we don’t want it happening again! As difficult as it is, try and be honest about how you feel.

Often people will say sleeping with a best friend can leave your relationship beyond repair and sometimes this is the case. But all best friends are close for a reason. It’s up to both of you to work out what it is that makes you great mates and if it’s still worth fighting for after everything that’s happened. At the end of the day if it was just sex and both of you regret it then don’t let it come between you.

I’m sure things will work out for you both.

Best of luck,

Mike x